The Day My Blog Came Before My Husband…Oops!

It was the first snow storm of the year.  I drove a 45 minute ride, in 2 1/2 hours. The plan was to come home to see my husband IK before he left to work the night shift. However, I was busy in combat with hills, ice and snow.

Instead he called to see where I was and how was doing. I wasn’t doing well. My foot was swollen and hurting from the constant driving, I explained to him. He fussed because it only reminded him that I did not go to a second doctor to figure out what was wrong with my foot. I tried to explain myself. Then I quickly realized my excuses was only valid in my head, and I would not get empathy from him.

I called out from work. I battled with this idea too. Although more than likely I wasn’t going to fight as much to get to work as I did to get home, my swollen foot was sufficient for me to get some rest.

The following morning, IK called me when he thought I was going to work. He knew from my morning voice that I wasn’t. He sound disappointed. We hung up.

I started to write. That’s what I do sometimes when I can’t fall to sleep. I write. Sometimes I dose off, and other times I write until I am forced to stop. That morning the idea of having breakfast ready when my husband came home, interrupted my flow.

We can have a simple but hardy breakfast of eggs, bacon and grits. First I will take a shower, put on his favorite perfume, and change these cozy mitch-match pajamas.  Then we can talk while we eat in bed, with my foot elevated on stacks of pillows. Then he will kiss my neck and say thank you, I will smile and say you’re welcomed. We will cuddle until we fall asleep. I thought.

“Let me know when you’re close to home. I can make breakfast.” I texted him.

The phone rang seconds after.

It was official. He said that I didn’t have to worry about it if I was not hungry myself, but the tone in his voice said he would love to come home to a home-cook meal.

While waiting for his call I went back to writing. Before I knew it I heard tires rumble through the snow and Mr. B (my dog) ears perked up. That’s when I realized I forgot to make my husbands breakfast.

I checked the phone.

Husband (2 Missed Calls), it said.

I called him. Don’t ask me why. I heard it again in his voice. Disappointment. This time he had every right. I headed to the kitchen. However, when he said don’t worry about it this time, it sound like he meant it.

“It would only take a few minutes,” I try to convince him, as I  fried up the bacon with extra oil, so it can cook faster. I scrabbled the eggs, instead of making over-easy. And I kept my eyes on the high flame that was on the small pot of grits. I did it. That was the fastest I ever made breakfast, ever. Unfortunately it was the fastest he ever went to sleep after work, the fastest.

“Baby are you sure you’re not going to eat?” I said.

“Yes. I am sure.” He said with his face buried to in the bed.

I could not believe that I let time slip away from me. I felt so guilty. I didn’t know what to do. Even eating didn’t feel right. So, Mr. B finished what I could not eat.

I dropped the ball on this one. Balancing the life of a writer and wife.

 

Photo Credit: Picnoi
  • I can relate to this post a lot! I hate when I tell my husband that I will do something for him and then I get so caught up writing that I forget to fulfill my promise! Hope your husband forgave you quickly. It can be really hard trying to balance creativity with all the other things we have to do.

    • Thank God he didn’t sweat it. I think I felt a way more than he did. Shuba IIea you said the truth, it is hard to balance creativity and other things. Because creativity sometimes comes when it’s not the best time. And sometimes it can feel like it is taking over your life. Thanks for reading.

  • Starkey

    Awww….I’m sure he understood after it was all said and done. The balancing act is tricky. I tend to spend more time with my boyfriend versus writing. I needed this lesson as well. Thanks for sharing!!!!!

    • I am still learning. However, I am getting better with the writing I just have to now make sure it does not stop me from doing everything else that’s important.

  • I can totally relate! I try to take advantage of my alone times. I am also working on waking up an extra hour earlier and designating early morning on the weekends to work. That way I don’t have to worry about blog work getting in the way of my relationship. But it’s still a struggle!

    • Yes I know. The struggle is so real. However, I know it is possible we just have to figure out what works for us and our family and try to communicate. I say if Beyonce can do it, I am saying. lol. I am looking forward to slaying my year as well and making healthy relationships.

  • Kjoywrites

    I don’t have a husband but I can relate to this post. My issue is when I get so caught up in writing a poem, a post or whatever and I take away from the family time, I just get lost sometimes and I need to fix that and fast. I have the same issue with being on social media on my phone.

    • I hear you, Kjoywrites. It’s all about finding balance. I try to work on a schedule, however creativity sometimes don’t care that I have other things in life to attend to. I am still working on it. I think it’s doable, but you have to be patient with yourself.

  • Omg I can relate to this post so much! No husband, but I have a demanding 4 yr old, so finding the time to spend with her on top of blog work after coming home from my “actual job” can be challenging!

    • I don’t have children “yet,” and I don’t know how the mothers do it. I believe it’s possible, but not without falling short sometimes. I try not to feel guilty. I try to remember I am human.

  • I went thru this a couple weeks ago with my husband. I got up and played with our son before I decided to cook breakfast. He was so disappointed that I didn’t start cooking as soon as I stepped foot on the floor. I felt bad…like I was being a bad wife. He left for work without eating…and the kid barely ate any of what I had cooked.